The last several days/weeks have been frustrating. Oddly enough, I’m just now realizing it to some extent.
I had to travel to Houston for two weeks for work. I’m working on a pretty big project that is on an extremely accelerated time table, and pressure is beginning to roll downhill from upper management, through middle management, to the peons, including some of my co-workers and yours truly. It was hot in Houston, and it’s not really the place you want to be in the dead of summer, but all of that has been said on this blog, so refer back if you care to reminisce.
I’ve also been “dieting” with the help of My Fit Pal, and app for iPhone. I blogged about it when I first started about a month ago, and while it has been challenging, I have also seen some results (losing about 10 lbs in the first month!), but it’s definitely put a cramp in my style, particularly my dessert, snack and junk food style.
Maybe it’s just the beginning of the school year and the overflow of my wife’s schedule, or maybe it’s just coincidence, but my work, social and spiritual calendars have been surging these past few weeks. I feel like I’m in a constant state of flux and that I’m starting to neglect or just barely squeeze in relationships and responsibilities that somehow seem even more important when I have less time for them. Random tasks and odds and ends jobs get pushed to the fringe of my consciousness. Communication with my wife, family and friends is approaching an all-time low, if it’s not already there now. Even my dog, who typically does a great job entertaining himself, is seeming more restless.
Tonight this all culminated it several fits of what I thought was completely justified and righteous road rage toward wave after wave of nit wit drivers making the same vehicular mistakes over and over and over and over again in a colossal traffic jam stemming from a “brilliant” display of construction prowess. I’m pretty sure my limited experience in construction management and civil engineering gives me firm ground upon which I can stand and speak both authoritatively and definitively on this subject.
So what’s the point of all this? Well, obviously the point is me. Am I just stating facts or complaining about my circumstances or is it more than that? I will assure you I am not complaining. I realize I am blessed beyond reason, and I cannot even begin to fathom the common grace that God is currently extending to me much less the unwarranted but precious saving grace He provided through his son, but I digress. I may also be stating facts, but the problem is that it’s all about me.
When I place myself in the center of the universe, everything becomes a battle of me against the world. My work life becomes frustrating and draining. My food consumption becomes microscopic calorie counting. My relationships become chores carving out more of my precious time. Other drivers are intentionally driving poorly, conspiring to keep me from my dinner and sweet tea at McAlister’s Deli and making me late to church.
But when I place God at the center of my universe, everything becomes simplified. My customers and co-workers are people with lives and families not just numbers and deadlines. My healthy eating habits are not punishment, but are a way of stewarding the body God has given me. My relationships are interactions with other souls that Christ died for and has place in my life for His glory and my joy. Poor drivers are just careless fools who don’t watch what their doing or pay attention to their surroundings. (OK, so I’m still working on that last one.) The point is: I’m not the point. God is. And that’s incredibly freeing.
Is it all about you? What if it didn’t have to be?